A Different Kind of Christmas

This year during December's Christmas events and gatherings our soldier may be absent from our midst, but never from our hearts!

This is simply a different kind of Christmas. Just going out to get a freshly cut Christmas tree is quite the task for our daughter-in-law and her three young children! 

We have mailed our last Christmas box to those serving in Afghanistan and elsewhere overseas. We pray they all arrive to their recipients...including our son. These boxes of love may simply contain items most of us can go buy within a few minutes' drive...but they contain much more than that to those who receive them. They contain a feeling of "home." Of love. Of support. Of generous and thoughtful giving and humble receipt. They may contain items they need and cannot get readily. When a box is opened, love pours out!

This Christmas season I have not given any thought to what I would like to receive from my loved ones in a box. My thoughts have been geared up on what I can put IN a box....and how many boxes can we get over there to lift up and encourage those far from home?

I think of it this way. All military families of deployed troops will miss their soldier in a variety of ways this holiday season....family groups might miss one or two from their midst as a general rule. BUT...every soldier is most likely missing many people this Christmas. Family members, friends, co-workers, church family, social groups, you name it...it includes a lot of people! So I tell people, "Don't pray for me! Pray for my son...he's the one missing so many.  I will miss him for sure! And yes there will be an empty place and we will all miss his smoked meat! Yes, Christmas morning for his wife and kids will be different....but they will wake up together. He will wake up to an empty cube of a room that he has called "home" since he deployed. But he won't be alone! Jesus is there...

Jesus is the reason for the season...and joy in the heart can be found, no matter the external circumstances! Our hero is celebrating the same Jesus 11,000 miles away...and that right there means we are together this Christmas. In thought, in action, in heart. All things that count....and maybe, just maybe, we can reach out and touch that computer screen and see his face on Christmas Day. That would be the greatest gift for all of us this year! :)

The following graphic and poem was posted on my son's facebook page to his wife...I found it fitting to place here with this post. May all of our troops serving overseas this Christmas find joy of the heart. It's a different kind of Christmas and although you may be physically far from home, you are ever near to those you love and those who love you...

LCain

CHRISTMAS IN A BOX

Just prior to deployment my son had to tell his little boy that Daddy wouldn't be home for Christmas. He had an Army job to do. That little four year old boy was zeroed in on that fact...

When my grandson came to my house the next time that's all he wanted to talk about...the fact that Daddy was going to be gone a long, long time and not be home at Christmas or for his birthday.

I had a thought. I said, "Do you remember when you lived far from Nana and you couldn't be here at Christmas last year? What did we do?" His eyes lit up. He said, "You MAILED my presents! And I liked getting presents in the mail!" 

 Uh huh....now he's thinking. "I bet we can mail Daddy's presents to him!" Yep...now we're on the right track. His spirits lifted and he immediately started to think about what to put in a box to mail to Daddy for Christmas....leggos, robots, cars. :)

There's a lot of love that goes into a box. Material things matter to our men and women who need them, but it's the love in there that matters most.  Love can be felt from a family member who made cookies, but it can also be felt from a total stranger who chose YOU to send a box to...

Little tokens of appreciation go a long, long way when one is off doing military work in far off places. Little pieces of home keep one connected. Attached. Remembered.

Today we are so fortunate to have the technology we do in keeping connected with ones serving overseas or elsewhere out of reach. I can't help but reflect on my grandparents and great grandparents during their children's service eras. Waiting for months at a stretch to hear anything from their children had to be exhausting! I have letters from WWII written by my great uncles to their mother (my great grandmother). Most of them reflect how lonely they were - longing to hear a word from home. I simply cannot imagine....today I can hop on the computer and jot my son a message. It might take a few days for him to respond, but he usually does. I am so very grateful for that!

Let's not allow facebook or the internet to replace handwritten letters from home. It's something tangible from a loved one that they can hold, feel, look at, and keep. 

So, send a box to someone overseas this Christmas. There are plenty of organizations out there you can support through if you don't have a specific soldier currently deployed to mail one to.

Jot a personal handwritten note to include in your box...it will mean the world to one far from home.

You will be surprised at how many people would be willing to help if asked. In the past month we have shipped six care packages to our son's unit to share and have four more ready to send. All boxes include donated items from our church and others that we've tossed in with our own purchases. To date all boxes have had shipping fees donated!

It's a terrific experience to see who helps in what way. It's humbling and it's amazing....and we are ever grateful! I have never laid eyes on the people my son serves with...but I feel like they are some of "my own" in this journey. And I will continue to bake them cookies until they all come home....

 LCain

REASSURANCE....

I had a sweet elderly lady call me last week.

I did not know her, but I do now...

She's a military grandmother who leads a prayer circle for our local military families through her church.

She asked if she could add our son's unit to her list.

Of course!

There's reassurance in knowing that others -many we do not know - are joining us in prayer for our loved ones serving far from home.

She mailed me this poem:

REASSURANCE
Dear Lord, could You spare some Guardian Angels 

To give me peace of mind
As my children wander from me 

And stretch the ties that bind
You have heavenly legions, Father, 

Could You send me just a few
To guard my eager children 

As I give them Lord to You
O thank You, thank You Father 

And oh my glad heart sings
I'm certain that I just now heard

The swish of Angels' wings!

 

(Image from Support Our Deployed Airmen and Support Our Deployed Troops website)

LCain

HUMBLED...

Wow. Have you ever had a total stranger tell you they are praying for you? 

Today I took two boxes to the local post office to mail to my son overseas. They were the first of what I anticipate to be many boxes we will ship in the coming year. These two boxes were plopped on the counter and a friendly, familiar face said, "These for your son?" I said yes. She helped me work on the customs forms and labels and while doing that we talked about how moms deal with deployment. She was prior Navy. Said she wondered how her mom did it when she was in the service. I said, "We pray through it."

The elderly woman standing next to me at the next counter said, "You tell your son I said 'THANK YOU' and that I'm praying for him."  That humbled me and I valued that expression of gratitude! And if that wasn't enough, the man behind me spoke up and said, "She's not the only one praying.." 

The three of us stood there and I got weepy. Two people I didn't know reached out their prayers for my son and the men and women he serves with. I couldn't speak. My emotions were on my sleeve and all I could say was, "Your kindness is going to make me cry! Thank you.." And I walked away and wept all the way to the car, and after I got in the car I just sat there a minute. I totally wasn't expecting that, Lord!

I wasn't weepy today. I was rather cheerful as a matter of fact, happy to finally be mailing my boy these items I've lovingly thought through and planned and packed. The support that was shown in those few moments of time  totally hit me down to my core! And it was a moment I will never forget....

After running home to blow my nose and fix my makeup, I moved on to my next errand for the day. I needed to make copies of a flier regarding donations we are collecting for the boxes. Again, the worker is familiar to me as I've done business in this place on a number of occasions. She made the copies and came back and said she'd like to post one up in the store for me. And then proceeded to give me some suggestions for other stores to approach for the same. There was just something "understanding" in her voice. A nice looking young man standing next to her, about late 20's I'd say. Close to my son's age. She then pointed to him and said, "This is MY son. He just got back from Africa." I looked at him and just said, "Thank you." Again, I was ready to boo hoo. I found another local military mom and soldier to support and pray for. He told me who he serves with and that he has another two years to serve.

I hope all military mothers experience support for their children in the service. These willing servants deserve a lot more than they receive. Many have to struggle to get or keep benefits earned in a very difficult way. Many have sacrificed so much more than we will ever know. The entire family does.

So from me to you....THANK YOU. Know I am praying for your child each and every day. And if you shed a tear or two when people say that to you, it's OK. It's from your mamma's heart. No matter how old that "child" may be....

LCain

A SOLDIER'S PRAYER

 

 

Lord, I answered a special call

 

To serve, protect and defend

 

Be with me Lord wherever I go

 

Be near me til this journey ends

 

 

Protect us all here on the ground

 

Out at sea and in the air

 

Guide our each and every step

 

Keep us safe within Your care 

LCain 2012

WHERE'S YOUR HEAD?

A few months ago my father was diagnosed with metastatic liver cancer. It originated in the liver but had already spread to bone, and lymph. The first thing my Army son did was call his Pappaw and ask, "Where's your head in all of this?" They talked about God being in control, staying positive, and being strong throughout the journey of chemotherapy.

Sometimes we as military families need to ask ourselves that very same question. Especially if we are seeking a faith based journey. Where's our head in all of this?

For me, I yo-yo back and forth between being strong in the Lord and wanting to wilt to the ground in a heap at Jesus' feet. Sometimes my head says I'm being strong and trusting in Him...but my body does crazy things that indicate otherwise! My stomach hurts and churns whenever I eat. I wake up in the night and immediately think of my son and where he is and what he might have to endure there. I cry. My patience isn't as good. I feel "fussy" inside...agitated.

My head is not in alignment with my heart....

I pray. I seek God's Word. I think I'm on the right path in trusting God for His will with my son in this season of serving his country. Then why do I still experience these symptoms?

Because my heart is battling the human nature in me as a mother.

My Christian teachings in my head tell me what to do, but my heart has yet to follow in this particular scenario...and become aligned with one another.

Once that happens, peace replaces fear and worry and anxiety. Once I "let go and let God" there will be less tummy troubles, better rest, and my inner being won't feel in so much turmoil.

Will I go through this entire year in perfect peace? Probably not. I will probably need to pray for peace throughout this entire year. On a daily basis. It will be a walk with Jesus by my side, gently coaxing me to let Him handle the burden, because He is able to handle anything that comes my way. And my son's.

Isaiah 12:2  “Behold, God is my salvation; I will trust, and will not be afraid; for the LORD GOD is my strength and my song, and he has become my salvation.”

Sometimes I need to pull my head up out of the sand and raise it toward the Son. I need to stay focused on Him and His Words for me. That's where peace will be....and is.

Where are you in all of this? Where's your head? In the sand pit...or high and lifted up, looking at the Son?

Numbers 6:25-26 the LORD make his face to shine upon you and be gracious to you; the LORD lift up his countenance upon you and give you peace.

LCain

I KNOW WHO HOLDS TOMORROW...

Saying goodbye to my son just prior to deployment was one of the hardest days of my life! I wanted to hold him tight and not let him go. Words weren't easy to speak. My throat closed up. The words wouldn't come out. There were so many I wanted to say! All I could squeak out was, "I love you son..." He knows my heart. And I knew his.  Not easy for him either, but he's a true genetic carrier of being a "man of few words."  When it comes to emotional things, that is. Socially, he's a talker! And can make people laugh...and he loves kidding around. :)

That day happened to be my grandkids' last fall soccer game. We all gathered at the soccer complex and took scads of pictures! I even took two art canvases and had my son do his hand print on each of them with art paint in blue. The kids will do their hand prints in red. Something fun to hang on the wall...

One by one, family members started to leave and it was just down to his family, my daughter and her family and the two of us. Soccer games were going on and here we were saying goodbye to our soldier for a year. Our own private thing going on in the midst of others who didn't have a clue what was taking place....I wanted to shout it out, but knew he just waned a private family affair. I wanted everybody to know what he was about to do (for them) for the next 12 months! But he silently walked away...

Tough day for all. I sat at home watching the clock. My husband had to work. He's arriving at the airport about now...the kids are having to say goodbye to their daddy now....he should be boarding the plane now....Jesus help him. He's the one who will miss his entire family. He's the one who will be so far away from home. He's the one who will face the unknown each and every day for the next 365 days. God be with them ALL. Til they all come HOME....

We won't know what his day involves. He won't be able to tell us. That's the hard part. Not knowing what he's going through and how he's dealing with it. But Jesus knows...and while we won't know what tomorrow holds for him (all of them) we know WHO holds tomorrow. Without that assurance this journey for us as a family would be so much more difficult than it already is.

That's how we said goodbye. On the soccer field with the kids running to and fro laughing and giggling and waving their flags. Eating peanut butter crackers and bananas. Drinking juice boxes. Getting all hot and sweaty. 

A lot will transpire in the time he's absent from us, but we will keep a diary and take lots of pictures to make sure he doesn't miss anything this family does. :) We hope we can skype. We hope we can hear his voice, see his face, reach out and touch that computer screen every once in a while....and blow kisses to the one we love. The kids will mail pictures they draw, crafts they make, and lipstick kisses on napkins. They'll help me make cookies and fudge to send in boxes.

We're on a new journey. One we will take with Jesus for sure. He knows what's ahead of us, and He brings up the rear. His presence will be felt no matter where we go or what we do. And we pray our son feels that same presence thousands of miles away.

LCain 

TIE A YELLOW RIBBON....

We see them all the time. Magnetic yellow ribbons with the term "Support Our Troops" printed on them. Yellow ribbons tied around tree trunks in the yards of military families. 

 Here's a little history behind that customary expression of support...

 From Wikipedia
During the Iran hostage crisis, the yellow ribbon was used a symbol of support for the hostages held at the United States embassy in Tehran. In November 1979, a committee headed by Suzan E. Garrett of the Jaycees ladies service organization in Leitchfield, Kentucky organized a campaign to "Tie A Yellow Ribbon" around public trees as well as encouraging people to wear tied ribbons on lapels in support of the U.S. hostages being held in Iran. She was interviewed on ABC-TV by Ted Koppel on the newly created Nightline late-night news program and later by Peter Jennings for ABC's World News Tonight.
This symbolism continued and gained further notoriety in December 1979, when Penelope Laingen, wife of Bruce Laingen who was the most senior foreign service officer being held hostage, tied a yellow ribbon around a tree on the lawn of her Maryland home. The ribbon primarily symbolized the resolve of the American people to win the hostages' safe release. Yellow ribbons featured prominently in the celebrations of their return home in January 1981.
The yellow ribbon saw renewed popularity in the United States during the Gulf War in the early 1990s. It appeared along with the slogan "support our troops", in the form of yellow ribbons tied to trees, and countless other contexts. It often had the implied meaning of "bring our troops home" from the Desert Shield and Desert Storm troop deployments. It appeared again during the 2003 invasion of Iraq with similar meanings, most prominently in the form of a yellow ribbon printed on magnetized material and displayed on the outside of automobiles.

In the United States military, the symbol of the yellow ribbon is used in a popular marching song. The first version copyrighted was the 1917 version by George A. Norton, which he titled 'Round Her Neck She Wears a Yeller Ribbon" (For Her Lover Who Is Far, Far Away). While he tells in the song about the love between Susie Simpkins and her soldier lover Silas Hubbard, his chorus goes:

'Round her neck she wears a yeller ribbon,
She wears it in winter and the summer so they say,
If you ask her "Why the decoration?"
She'll say "It's fur my lover who is fur, fur away.

The lyrics were altered and the song was titled She Wore a Yellow Ribbon by Russ Morgan for the 1949 movie of the same name. This was performed by several popular musicians of the 1940s, including Mitch Miller and The Andrews Sisters. The Tanner Sisters recorded their version in London on December 30, 1949. It was released by EMI on the His Master's Voice label as catalog number B 9873.
The text of the Army version approximates the following, with local variations:

Around her hair she wore a yellow ribbon
She wore it in the springtime
In the merry month of May
And if you ask her why the heck she wore it
She wore it for her soldier who was far far away

Far away, far away
She wore it for her soldier
Who was far, far away

Around the block she pushed a baby carriage
She pushed it in the springtime
In the Merry month of May
And if you ask her why the heck she pushed it
She pushed it for her soldier who was far far away

Far away, far away
She pushed it for her soldier
Who was far, far away

Behind the door her daddy kept a shotgun
He kept it in the springtime
In the merry month of May
And if you ask him why the heck he kept it
He kept it for her soldier who was far far away

Far away, far away
He kept it for her soldier
Who was far, far away

On the grave she laid the pretty flowers
She laid them in the springtime
In the merry month of May
And if you asked her why the heck she laid them
She laid them for her soldier who was far far away

Far away, far away
She laid them for her soldier
Who was far, far away

Another wonderful site with more history of the yellow ribbon tradition:
http://voices.yahoo.com/history-importance-yellow-ribbon-662036.html 

My favorite yellow ribbon expression...

TIL THEY ALL COME HOME!!!!

How do you don your yellow ribbons in tribute?

LCain

 MEET LAUREL....

 

 The following submission is from Laurel Olmsted, a military mother I've never met but have been in touch with for several years now. Thank you, Laurel, for this post! I know there are many military mothers that will shake their heads in unity when reading your story! Even though it was written in 2003 these are timeless words that every military family can relate to...

We have three sons. Our oldest went into the Marines but was sent home due to a bee allergy. This was before 9/11---I am sure they would have kept him, had we been at war. 
Our middle and youngest sons went into the Army shortly before 9/11. They both were deployed. I didn’t take a true breath for four years, but I did learn what praying without ceasing meant. 

Some nights I slept by my computer just in case one of them was able to ICQ me. I lived with the TV on and hung on to every scrap of news I could get. And I waited. I waited for emails from my sons, I waited for news from the military, and I waited on living my life. When your child is in a combat zone, it consumes you. One of the worst things I have ever had to do is take my son, my baby, and put him on a plane to return to combat. What kind of mother does that?? He may have been the Army’s soldier, but he was still the little boy I had nurtured and loved with all my heart. I needed a support system, but as war was a new experience for me, there was none. 
I got together with two other moms and we talked about our sons. We shared our fears. We held on to each other and we held each other up. Those first few meetings turned into the beginning of a military family support group that would span 10 years and touch thousands of lives. I have had so many people ask me why I worked so hard, gathering donations, packing boxes, shipping boxes, giving speeches, writing letters. They said that I was doing such a wonderful thing for our troops and I was given awards. What they didn’t understand was that I didn’t do it for the accolades; I did it for each and every mother’s son and daughter serving in harm’s way. I did it to make sure that they knew they were not forgotten. Another thing that helped get me thru those years was my writing. I wrote poems, I wrote stories, and I wrote letters to other soldiers. I wrote about my new normal. People who don't have children in a war zone cannot fully understand what we go through every second of every day. Our life is no longer what we used to consider normal. Now normal is watching TV news and flipping back and forth between CNN and Fox; having the radio AND TV on so you don't miss anything. It's reading the paper for any details; it's seeing something in a store that makes you cry, or having someone say, "how are you?" and it brings you to tears. It's checking your email at 2, 4, 5, 6 am just in case....It's seeing the flag and knowing that is the symbol of America that is sewn on the soldiers' uniforms, the symbol they are making a stand for.

 

 It's tying yellow ribbons to anything that will stand still. It's wearing the picture of your son over your heart and you reach up and touch it without even being aware of it. And you pray. And you remember the little boy who you would not even allow to cross the street by himself. And you pray. That is our "normal." When the soldiers return, they will never be the same. But neither will we. We will have grown and found strength within us that we never knew we had. And we have made the best of friends with others who carry a piece of our heart in theirs. 
Laurel A. Olmsted (written Dec. 2, 2003) 
PS...My sons have returned home and I am forever thankful for that. When I wrote the piece above, I had no idea how true the statement would be that the soldiers would never be the same. Sometimes, war is never over for our returning military. May God bless our troops and those who love them. 
Laurel Olmsted October 16, 2013

WHAT? NO DETAILS?

Most women are detail oriented. We have to be to juggle the tangled webb of demands throughout our day. Work, kids, family, sports/hobbies, church, chores, cooking....the list is endless! If we aren't subject to watching details then things tend to go amuck.

There have been many times that my father in law will hang up the phone from a conversation only for my mother in law to call right back and ask for specifics. She's "detail oriented." He is not. Many of you in the female gender know what I'm talking about!

That being said, I can tell you right now I am uncomfortable in the military scenario of not knowing details about my son's duties! Or deployment. It's hard to not ask questions or want answers. Not out of being "nosy" but out of genuine care and concern and wanting to be involved in his life so I know how to pray for him and know how to support him. We are a close family. And because of that it's hard for all of us...

So. I sent my son off with very few details given. To me, he's going off into the great unknown and that's just plain hard. He's going to be thousands of miles away dealing with who knows what and all I can do whenever we can communicate is tell him how WE are doing? Ahhhhhh........I don't care how old he is, he's my beloved son and I want to know how he is! LOL "Fine" just doesn't quite fit the bill. It helps, but doesn't quite satisfy.

During his school years our son would come home and I would ask.."So, how was your day?" "Fine..." "What did you do?" "Nothing..." Oh good grief. Come on now! Tell me more than that! :) I want the five W's...who what when where why and how. I'm a journalist at heart. Writing is in my veins. Writers want and need details!!! Sigh...

I do a lot of family research. The need to know details is what drives me to dig deeper and harder and longer on any given line. I'm the family sleuth... 

But, here we are again. Back at a season where we'll get few answers. And it drives me nuts. All we can do is trust that GOD knows the details that we'll never get. He can do more for our son than we can any day. We've given him a solid foundation in life. Now we just have to give him to God in this, believing that our all knowing Lord of Lords and King of Kings will handle the details. "Fine" will be good news. And I long to hear that word on a regular basis. "Fine" may not mean "perfect" but that's the word we'll pray to get. And one little detail I forgot to mention? God knows all the meanings behind that one little word....this is one scenario where I cannot dig for answers. I have to let it go. And simply trust....and breathe.

LCain

THIS ABOUT SAYS IT ALL....

My words not needed. Only His....

To continue the text...

His peace will guard your hearts and your minds....

What every military family needs.

LCain 

(Photo from God Is Good site)

HE KNOWS MY NAME!

What would we do if a well known military official knocked on our door and called us by name when we answered it? We would be shocked, wouldn't we? The first thing out of our mouths would be "How do you know who I am?!" Some would be in awe, wanting to bow down in respect of this high ranking officer! This man who has made a career out of protecting... you and me. But some would be ashamed and try to hide and not let him in!

You can be assured that Jesus, our Lord, King, Commander and Chief knows our names. Each and every one.

Every time I fall into a pattern of worry over my soldier son or when I miss him terribly all I need to do is remember that Jesus knows my name. He knows my heart. He sees each tear that falls. And He hears my prayers.That's amazing! 

I am in awe of my Jesus and want to bow down in respect and amazement that He would take priority in focusing on...me. In knowing that He cared enough to die for me....and wants a personal relationship with...me. With ...you. But some will try to hide and not let Him come in when He knocks on the door of their hearts.

There is a song that keeps coming to mind from time to time. I first heard this on a Promise Keepers CD several years ago. Various friends of mine presented this song in church at different times through the years. It's one that I take to heart these days. And I can just hear my friends' beautiful voices from years past...

 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hXsiWoyjw60   (You Tube link to copy/paste into your browser.)

(By Maranatha Singers)

Lyrics:

I have a Maker
He formed my heart
Before even time began
My life was in his hands

He knows my name
He knows my every thought
He sees each tear that falls
and He hears me when I call
I have a Father
He calls me His own
He?ll never leave me
No matter where I go

He knows my name
He knows my every thought
He sees each tear that falls
and He hears me when I call

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JKuEwf9W1cQ   And here is another song by the same title that speaks to me and maybe it will to you as well. (Again, it's another You Tube link to copy/paste).

Whatever military journey you are on, remember...HE KNOWS YOUR NAME! No matter where you go.

LCain

 Below image from Proverbs 31 Ministries website...

YOU ARE MY STRENGTH!!!!

The following links should take you to the You Tube song "You Are My Strength" by Hillsong....if you cannot click on them, copy/paste them into your browser. They both worked for me by copy/pasting.

 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iwvGFWKBo4o 

OR

 http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=iwvGFWKBo4o

If not working, please search for the song on your You Tube search. The picture on the beginning of the video is of God's hands holding the Earth. Worth listening to...

LCain

GETTING THROUGH....AND GETTING BY

You know the old saying...."One day at a time." Well, for military families it's sometimes "one minute at a time!" My mother's favorite saying in trying times was "This too, shall pass."  And it usually does. Each day can bring its share of joy, blessings, smiles, tears, challenges, obstacles...all wrapped up in one complete package.

Below are 10 "tricks of the trade" I came up with to help us get through our days when our loved one is deployed or otherwise absent from our midst for long periods of time. This post can relate to anyone in our military family circles.

1. Accept the fact that we will move through the motions of our every day missing the one serving his/her country. They will be on our hearts, in our prayers, and on our minds continually!

2. Develop a routine for any children involved. Routines should include writing letters or drawing pictures to mommy or daddy. Let them mail them at the post office. Let them help pack care boxes to ship...so what if there are a few leggos tossed in? :)

3. Include mommy/daddy in daily conversation so the children will still feel "connected." Skype if / when possible.  Look at photo albums of favorite family pictures. Make the kids their own little photo book of your soldier. Keep mommy/daddy included!  All of this is as much for grandparents as it is for the remaining parent to do. Grandparents can become a strong influence/resource during times of parental absence!

4. Participate in spouse support groups or military mothers' groups in your area. There are also online groups. Pick one that meets your particular needs. Others going through the same situation can be a valuable tool in handling the daily stress. Good sounding boards.Helping someone else tends to help us in our own journey as well...

5. Church support. For Christian military families this is a large measure of support! There can be several willing souls ready to hop in the car and meet a need when called upon. Many are just a phone call away and stand in the gap, ready to help.

6. Family. I know of many military families who have moved to locations closer to relatives during a loved one's deployment/absence. While difficult to get re-established somewhere, family can play a crucial role in getting through and getting by.

7. Take care of yourself! If you are left with several children to raise "alone" during deployment/absence, make sure to get enough rest in the midst of all the business of your day. You won't be good to anyone if you are totally exhausted and/or sick all the time! Take some "me" time and don't feel guilty about it! Mom also used to say, "Things will look brighter tomorrow." She was usually right about that too. A little rest does wonders. It won't change anything but our mentality perks up a bit in order to deal with it.

8. When moods are low and you need a laugh, make it happen! Watch a funny movie. Do something really silly with the kids! Pull up You Tube videos of Funniest Home Videos or of babies laughing or silly animal videos. Read funny kid books. Laughter is contagious. Soon the whole household will be in stitches! And moods will lighten...

9. Stay positive. Don't assume the worst.We all have our tearful moments! I have found that when I allow myself to "go there" I worry about things that may never happen. Then, when I pull away from that track of thinking and keep my mind focused on Jesus' Words, the tears cease. Sometimes it's a roller coaster ride. Some days are harder than others. Besides, staying positive keeps me from eating everything in the fridge...

10. Pray with expectation! Many times we pray, but we don't pray with expectation! There is a difference...

I am sure there are many more that your Family Resource people have shared with you. This is just my perspective and I hope it helps!

So, with these tips in mind, below are a few scriptures to help us remain hopeful, positive, and strong to get through these seasons. The only way to "get by" is to "get through." We can't skirt the issue. It is what it is and yes, it stinks at times! But one minute at a time, we will survive...with a little help from our friends and family. And a lot of help from Jesus.

Below was found on:  http://www.whatchristianswanttoknow.com/bible-verses-about-strength-25-encouraging-scripture-quotes/#ixzz2hLL47fZ3

 Romans 12:12  Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer.

 Romans 15:13  May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that by the power of the Holy Spirit you may abound in hope.

 Psalm 27:4-5 One thing have I asked of the LORD, that will I seek after: that I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life, to gaze upon the beauty of the LORD and to inquire in his temple.  For he will hide me in his shelter in the day of trouble; he will conceal me under the cover of his tent; he will lift me high upon a rock.

Zephaniah 3:17 The LORD your God is in your midst, a mighty one who will save; he will rejoice over you with gladness; he will quiet you by his love; he will exult over you with loud singing.

Isaiah 41:10  fear not, for I am with you;  be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you,  I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.

1 Chronicles 16:11  Seek the LORD and his strength;  seek his presence continually!

Exodus 15:2 The LORD is my strength and my song, and he has become my salvation; this is my God, and I will praise him, my father’s God, and I will exalt him.

Philippians 4:13  I can do all things through him who strengthens me.

Psalm 18:32-34  the God who equipped me with strength and made my way blameless. He made my feet like the feet of a deer  and set me secure on the heights. He trains my hands for war, so that my arms can bend a bow of bronze.

 Bible Verses Showing Strength Comes From Faith Not From Fear

Are you struggling through a situation today and are grasping for answers? How should you respond? Respond with faith and not fear, knowing the promises of God and His mighty hand will hold you through any situation!

Psalm 27:1   The LORD is my light and my salvation;  whom shall I fear? The LORD is the stronghold of my life;  of whom shall I be afraid?

Matthew 17:20  He said to them, “Because of your little faith. For truly, I say to you, if you have faith like a grain of mustard seed, you will say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move, and nothing will be impossible for you.”

Mark 10:52  And Jesus said to him, “Go your way; your faith has made you well.” And immediately he recovered his sight and followed him on the way.

Matthew 21:21  And Jesus answered them,  “Truly, I say to you, if you have faith and do not doubt, you will not only do what has been done to the fig tree, but even if you say to this mountain, ‘Be taken up and thrown into the sea,’ it will happen.

Bible Scripture Quotes About Strength as Related to Courage

Jesus has truly overcome the world the day he gave His life for all on the cross. Take peace and be encouraged knowing it is Him who is mighty to save. He will not leave you or forsake you.

Deuteronomy 31:6  Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread of them, for it is the LORD your God who goes with you. He will not leave you or forsake you.”

John 16:33  I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.”

Psalm 23:4  Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,   I will fear no evil, for you are with me;   your rod and your staff, they comfort me.

Amen.

LCain

FEAR FACTOR:

AN INSTINCTIVE DESIRE TO PROTECT OUR YOUNG -

AND WHAT TO DO WHEN WE CAN'T

Mothers of all kinds, be it in the animal kingdom or humankind, have this instinctive drive and desire to protect their children. 

My father raises cattle on the same farm that his father and grandfather raised cattle on.I cannot tell you how many times I have witnessed a mother cow bawling, stressing out and pacing back and forth when something wasn't right. Either she couldn't find her baby,  her baby got stuck in the fence, or was separated from her. Sometimes she could see her baby but couldn't get to it. In any case, mom was very anxious and making a lot of noise! There was one occasion recently that it seemed like mamma cow was beckoning us to come help her! She was looking back at us, bawling, then moving toward her baby and repeated this as if to say, "Come on! I need help! She's over here!" Jam, as we named her because she was stuck in a fence (in a jam so to speak), was all tangled up and mamma cow was highly upset! We eventually got Jam untangled and back safe and sound to her mother.As soon as we did the bawling stopped.

It's a God given instinct to protect one's young. The anxiety military mothers may experience (in my untrained opinion) could partially be related to this intense desire to protect that loved one from harm. It is a mother's job to nurture, care for, and protect the life of that child for 18 years. That's hard to just quit doing. In my own journey I have dealt with fear about two main outcomes of military service: 1. He could be injured or killed or 2. He could at some point suffer from PTSD.  And I can do nothing about preventing either! He is my son whom I love deeply. I don't want his mind or his body to experience trauma or injury! It hurts to even think about that. And it brings me to tears when I allow myself to go there. That's part of a mother's heart...I had family members who experienced PTSD symptoms after WWII..I pray for all of those experiencing this.

My son trained well... physically and mentally. But what about others? Are they fully prepared? What about the ones guarding the compound or driving the vehicles? Are they reliable with my son's life? Some mothers may not run these thoughts through their minds, but others will. Some new military mothers will weep just at the thought of their soldier being deployed! It's hard to adjust to.Being concerned for the safety of their child (no matter the age) over a long period of time is a huge monkey on a mom's back.And can get hard to carry. When we went to our son's graduation ceremony all of us as parents were escorted into a "holding room" for a while, waiting to get a glimpse of our soldiers. There was no joy. The air was thick with dread and uncertainty! Every mother had a wrinkle in her brow. You could have heard a pin drop in that room...because many of those graduating were heading to Iraq. Heavy stuff.

That's why Jesus tells us to CAST all our burdens on Him, for He cares for us! That word "cast" means hand over. Give up.The word "burdens" means those things that weigh us down. Heavy loads. Hard to handle. Too much for us to carry alone.The word "care" means loved. Cherished. One on one focus.

Honestly? I don't see how people get through situations like this without Jesus in their lives! He's my "go to" person. My Rock. My Shelter. My Refuge. My Hope. My Deliverer. My All...And God the Father knows our hearts! He loved HIS Son, in whom He was well pleased.  And God sent His Son into the world so that the world, through Him, might be saved. (Based on John 3:17) And if I may be bold in saying so, doesn't this relate in a sense to what our sons and daughters are doing? Being sent "into the world so the world through them might be saved (from tyranny, oppression, and terrorism)? God understands our hearts...

Moms, and I include myself in this directive, we need to lay our burdens down at the foot of the cross. Daily. Or maybe many times a day. Or it's going to be a long, bumpy ride. Physical symptoms may express internal anxieties if we don't get a handle on this fear factor. Do we TRUST Jesus enough to trust the lives of our (adult) children in His care? That's a huge question. Reality is, when we are His, our children are given to us to rear, but are His to use in adulthood. 

A statement made to me recently by a friend of mine (who is a pastor's wife) nailed it. "I'd rather my children die in the center of God's will than to live outside of it." Amen! I totally agree.

For me? I have that blessed assurance that my son is His.And that he is in the center of God's will. He and his wife pray for God's will in their lives.I have no doubt that a continued Army path is God's will for them. And that's where I need to stop the thought process! And trust the Lord. But at times, I continue with "But...this or that or the other." I'm still working on that part...maybe many of us are. And that's OK. Our Christian walk is something we have to work on every day for the rest of our lives until we see Him face to face. Then we'll know all the answers...

So for today, let's practice laying our burdens down at Jesus' feet and walking away from them. Let's work a little harder at letting Jesus carry this load. And let's trust Him a little more.Trust = Confidence in Him. Even when we may not know all the answers.Are you confident that Jesus can handle this journey?

Psalm 25: 4-5 Show me your ways, O Lord, teach me your paths; guide me in your truth and teach me, for you are God my Savior, and my hope is in you all day long.

(NIV)

LCain

(Image from Proverbs 31 Ministries)